Stalinism is alive and well in Heworth.

Regular readers may have noticed a spot of Stalinist revisionism creeping into the blog just recently. This unfortunate tendency was brought about due to the stress of being heckled by a cheap nightclub comic in drag. Normal sarcasm will be resumed forthwith.

Bootham Park v Wellington July 30th at Bootham Park

Back Row: Nathan Ellison, John Patrick, Tim Wills, Jamie Case, Nick Thompson, Richard Todd. Front Row: Kev Scully, Chris Burns, Pete Mitchell, Jack Gabbatiss, Judi Paul.

Bootham Park (161) lost to Wellington (162-7) by 3 wickets

Another scorching hot day beneath the relentless North Yorkshire sun. Looks daft when you write it down but that's the way it was. A shower overnight had perked up the few surviving patches of grass but the pitch looked drier than a week-old Pringle, promising uneven bounce and turn. It looked like a day to win the toss and bat. So I did.

The interesting nature of the pitch (one ball pitched on the line of off stump and skewed off at such an angle that it was picked up at short third man, yards wide of the bewildered keeper) was offset by a hard, fast outfield that gave full value for strokes along the ground. John Patrick and Jack Gabbatiss opened the batting, hoping to build on their lightning-fast century stand of two weeks before. Sadly it was not to be, Alan Baldock threaded the juiciest of Jaffas through Patrick's lately-impregnable defence and the keeper was soon picking up the bails. I came in at number 3 and somehow managed to negotiate some fine attacking bowling from Baldock and Andy Cockett. Gabbatiss advanced quickly to 14 from 10 balls before giving himself a little too much room to play through the off side and getting bowled by a good straight ball from Cockett.

I was then joined at the wicket by Kev Scully, who, in amongst his usual hefty clumps and crossbat swipes, hit an off-drive of almost spiritual beauty. It's a good job it went for four, because I was going nowhere; stock still, awestruck and completely stumped as to how it could possibly have happened. I mean, no offence to Kev, but those of us who've played him for years would attest that he's never really been one for the high left elbow or the classical flourish, but that shot was the real thing. Class. Unfortunately it wasn't to last, as he nicked a ball from David Baldock and was caught behind for 6.

Each time I see Judi Paul bat I have a feeling that a big score is not far away. With his strong wrists and great bat speed he makes the ball fizz across the outfield, often with a startled fielder in hopeless pursuit. Judi made it to 13 before he was trapped in front by an excellent delivery from David Baldock.

Taking advantage of the fast outfield and the odd loose ball, I was able to advance to a satisfying 52 from 51 balls, before chasing a wide one from Danny Sampson. John Galloway took a fabulous diving catch and hutchward I trudged. Nick Thompson was keen to resurrect the excellent comedy running skills displayed last week in Bradford, as he attempted to run himself out not once but twice. The first one had everything bar the Keystone Kops, but it was the second one that worked. Thompson almost ran two on his own, to the soundtrack of Richard Todd at the other end (quite rightly) screaming "No!".

Todd hit a few lusty blows including a peach of a six on his way to a quickfire 20, but the wickets had been falling steadily all afternoon and our run rate soon began to flag. Jamie Case and Chris Burns both got a start but soon perished as the Welly's bowlers turned the screw. It was left to Nathan Ellison and Tim Wills to try and bat out the final overs, but thanks to a ball that kept fractionally low, Ellison tickled the finest of under-edges and Galloway swooped to cap an excellent day behind the sticks with another fine catch.

At one point, we'd looked dead set for 200+ but the persistent loss of wickets cost us dear and we were all out for 161. Touch and go. It was by no means an easy pitch to bat on, but I couldn't help thinking of us, three weeks ago, chasing down 261. We would have to bowl well.

Things couldn't really have started much better, with Jamie Case inducing an uppish drive from Danny Sampson, which just carried far enough for me to take a low catch at mid off. Meanwhile at the other end, Howard Leadley was calmly and infuriatingly accumulating runs. Don't get me wrong, Howard's a top bloke, but he's one of those players who looks like he'll get out any ball. He seems to enjoy dangling his bat like a limp rag outside off stump, only to pull it out of the way at the very last picosecond, just as the keeper can almost feel the ball in his gloves. Then, just when you think you've got a straight one through him, it disappears back over your head like a bottle rocket while you mutter vile curses.

Tim Wills bowled a great spell from the Bootham end, mixing spin and seam to keep the batsmen guessing and returning figures of 8-4-13-0. Malcolm Harrison played an innings of real grit to hold the Welly's reply together, grinding his way to a battling 29 before Nick Thompson persuaded him into a loose drive and Gabbatiss held the catch.

Nathan Ellison found some useful turn from the hospital end and Judi Paul revealed yet another skill with a spell of pacey legspin. Both bowlers got the odd ball to spit before Judi sent a fast one scuttling under Howard Leadley's bat to end his resistance for 41. Jack Gabbatiss and Chris Burns built up some good pressure which was rewarded when Steve Relf obligingly slapped his second ball from Gabbatiss straight into my hands at wide mid on. It was in this same position that I picked up my third catch of the day, a top edge from John Galloway off Burns, who also snared the wicket of Laurence Hill with a neat caught-and-bowled.

With excellent boundary fielding limiting Graham Roberts to ones and twos, and Nick Warlow struggling to find the gaps, it looked like we might be able to contain them. Alas it was not to be, the Welly these days are made of sterner stuff. After Warlow edged one of my better balls through to John Patrick behind the stumps, Alan Baldock came to the crease to complete the job, striking consecutive boundaries either side of the wicket before hitting the winning runs through the covers.

After another great competitive game played in a wonderful spirit we adjourned to the pub. I think we'll leave it there for now, at least until I've checked how the libel laws apply in the blogosphere...

Bootham Park v Bradford CAMRA July 23rd 2006 at Hepworth & Idle CC

Back Row: Nathan Ellison, Richard Todd, Jamie Case, John Patrick, Mac McMahon, Tim Wills. Front Row: Wine Kini, Judi Paul, Pete Mitchell, Chris Burns, Nick Thompson

Bradford CAMRA (174-6) lost to Bootham Park (175-6) by 4 wickets

Hepworth & Idle's ground, home to Bradford CAMRA CC, is one of the more unusual venues on the Sunday friendly circuit. Located atop a hill with commanding views over the surrounding dales, it's a beautiful place to spend a sunny Sunday afternoon. The playing surface is firmly located in the "interesting" category, with more hills and valleys on the outfield alone than in the entire city of York. The previous evening had seen what the locals described as "a bit of weather", and the outfield was pockmarked all over as the result of industrial-gauge raindrops. The pitch was brown and slightly spongy on top with odd vibrant patches of grass. It had endured a thorough soaking but was rapidly drying out in the sunshine, making it a good toss to win. I won it and chose to bowl.

It was a great pleasure to field a side containing 10 bowlers and an even greater one that everybody performed so well. Jamie Case and Richard Todd kicked things off with their now-customary parsimony, conceding only 14 runs off the bat in the opening 8 overs. The first breakthrough came when Tim Wills replaced Case at the far end, Bob Taylor slapping his first ball straight into Chris Burns's safe hands at point. Wills went on to pick up a second wicket in the same over, employing a clever change of pace to rattle Paul Harrison's stumps.

To say that the bounce was a little uneven is a bit like saying Bill Gates has a few bob stashed away. From time to time, the ball took off almost vertically from a good length, even when delivered by the most sedate of bowlers. Scoring was no easy matter as the CAMRA batsmen struggled with the bounce and movement. An excellent partnership of 76 between Graham Coultous and Andrew George accelerated the run rate towards the end of the innings, with George ending unbeaten on 33. Coultous's gritty 41 was brought to an end by the currently golden John Patrick, taking a sharp catch off his own bowling.

Wine Kini bowled one of the strangest deliveries of the day, a yorker that pitched behind the crease yet still bounced over the top of the stumps. Luckily he managed to keep one low enough to perform a spot of Kiwi Feng Shui on Chris Wilkinson's castle. Judi Paul, in his second game for the club, kept wicket like he'd done it more than twice in the last fourteen years, the ball repeatedly finding his gloves with a reassuring thud. Chris Burns & Mac McMahon were each rewarded with a wicket as the home team finished on 154-6 from 40 overs.

I walked out to open the batting with John Patrick, fresh from last week's undefeated 126 against the Post Office. He carried on where he left off, stroking the ball around with ease and timing Dave Boothroyd for a sweet six over long off in only the second over of the innings. In accordance with the local rule, Patrick retired after reaching 59 off a mere 32 balls. I cuffed my way to 17 before trying one flick off the pads too many and offering a straight-up-and-down top edge into Andrew George's waiting gloves.

Judi Paul made a good-looking 18, including the shot of the day, a sublime wristy six over the long square leg boundary. Nick Thompson also made 18 in his first innings back from injury, getting on top of the bounce and scoring runs all around the wicket. Tim Wills and Richard Todd each struck a mighty six but perished soon after. Jamie Case was run out by an excellent direct hit and treated us to some exhibition quality swearing on the way back to the hutch, clocking up a healthy 7.5 on the sulkometer. Well played that man!

In the end it was left to Wine Kini to win the game with a lofted off drive as the Bootham Parkas overhauled CAMRA's total with 13 overs to spare. After a most convivial snifter with our hosts in the Symposium's beer garden, the Bootham boys adjourned to a local restaurant for the traditional post match curry. A bloody good time was had by all.

Paul Offord at the First Central American Cricket Championship

Offord catches up on some umpiring porn.

Photographs ©2006 Mark Callanan. See the entire gallery.

Former Bootham Park paceman and biffer Paul "Mister" Offord has recently become the club's second alumnus to represent a Latin American nation in an international competition (the first in this short and illustrious line being off-spinner, bon viveur and captain of Peru, Viv Ash).

Quoth the Offord:
"That was awesome, they are so welcoming, and the level of cricket was really high, I bowled the best I've ever done...quite an experience. Me and my mate Jamie also set up the first Mexico City interschool cricket comp as well. It's part of the condition of Mexico being affiliated to the ICC, so we trained these kids up from scratch, and then won the trophy against three other schools...all good fun. "

Bootham Park v Post Office July 16th 2006 at Bootham Park

Back Row: Nathan Ellison, Tim Wills, Jamie Case, John Patrick, Jack Gabbattis, Jack Sharples. Front Row: Jonathan Spratley, Nick Thompson, Pete Mitchell, Mac McMahon, Richard Todd.

Post Office (261) lost to Bootham Park (264-2) by 8 wickets

This was a great game. It had everything: big hitting, jammy bowling, comedy fielding, imaginative umpiring and the occasional flash of true competence. What's more, it was all played in a brilliant spirit.

A blistering sun and a pitch like bleached asphalt made it a toss I didn't want to lose, but lose it I did, and Glynn Botterill chose to bat. Jamie Case and Richard Todd got the bowling underway, working hard to extract any bounce and movement from the wicket. John Latham's bat dominated the opening overs, carving the ball to all parts with his customary brutality and moving to 50 before the team score had reached 70. Jamie Case, bowling an off-stump line to a strong legside field, nipped out Simon Burrows for 6. Then Nick Thompson, returning from injury, got rid of Furley for 5. Tim Wills chipped in with a couple of very valuable wickets, clean-bowling both Latham for 78 and the dangerous Gus Mackenzie for 44. The latter part of the innings was dominated by a fine innings from Glynn Botterill, whose clean-hitting took him to an undefeated 91.

Post Office finished on a huge looking 261 from 38 overs after an inspired spell of utterly chaotic bowling from John Patrick accounted for the last four wickets. This spell contained everything from perfect off-stump line and length to outright steak-and-kidney pie throwing. One ball from Patrick pitched less than half way down, ballooned into the air, evaded Tomlinson's somewhat agricultural swipe and plonked gently onto the top of middle stump. It somehow looked like it might be Mr Patrick's day. Maybe he should open the batting, I thought...

With debutant Jack Gabbatis matching Patrick stroke for stroke, the pair rocketed to a blistering stand of 123 at just under 10 an over. Gabbatis notched an impressive 52 before falling to a sharp catch by Botterill off Mackenzie's brisk medium pace. Jonathan Spratley came in at number 3 and proceeded to pick out the fielders with his usual precision before perishing to a catch off Watson's bowling for 11. Patrick continued to accumulate runs, nicking singles from good balls and peppering the boundaries with bad ones on his way to a near-chanceless 126 not out from 101 balls.

Not even the introduction of Messrs Latham and Botterill could stem the flow as the Bootham batsmen finished on 264-2 off 36.3 overs, a win by the flattering margin of 8 wickets. Spoilsport that I am, I had to nick the glory of hitting the winning runs on the way to a swift 33 not out, but the day undoubtedly belonged to John Patrick. It's not often you see a bowler of Glynn Botterill's quality hit out of the attack in one over worth 16 runs, but Patrick managed that and more in becoming only the fourth player (after Me, Mick Baines and the inevitable Mr Crowe) to score a century for the club.

All in all this was a fabulous game of cricket between two evenly-matched teams of thoroughly nice blokes and the excellent spirit continued back in the pub over a few jars of the finest (or at least coldest) ales.

Bootham Park v Rose & Crown July 2nd 2006 at Bootham Park

Back Row: John Crowe, Tim Wills, Jamie Case, Jonny Wilkins, Richard Todd, Dave Adie. Front Row: Kev Scully, Nathan Ellison, Pete Mitchell, Chris Storey, Wayne Kenny.

Rose & Crown (200-6) lost to Bootham Park (202-4) by 6 wickets

It was hot. A small drizzly shower before the game barely reached the ground before evaporating as the sun burned the clouds away. In a way it was quite a relief to lose the toss as Bruce Kitchener elected to bat. The pitch looked a belter.

Jamie Case and Richard Todd both bowled brilliantly, picking up 2 wickets each and restricting the scoring to less than 3 per over. A couple of bowling changes quickly upped the run-rate as the Rose boys latched onto anything short or wide. Gavin Stewart and Paul Anderson put together an excellent partnership of 156 before Tim Wills removed Anderson with a middle-stump grunter near the end of the innings. Stewart played an excellent innings, combining stout defence, clean hitting and a few deft nurdles to finish unbeaten on 105. Rose & Crown finished on exactly 200.

Jonny Wilkins and Chris Storey began the reply well before Wilkins's leg stump was pegged back by a beautiful swinging delivery from Graham Byrne. I came in at number 3, largely to play second fiddle to Chris Storey at the other end as we put on a partnership of 93 runs. Storey played an excellent innings and looked all set for a century until he played indecisively at one of Neil Reader's accurate off-breaks and was bowled through the gate for 88. Surely it's only a matter of time before he makes it to 3 figures. Jamie Case came to the crease and we put on another good partnership of 57 before Jimmy Allen rattled his castle. Bruce Kitchener deservedly picked up the wicket of Wayne Kenny but it was too little too late for the Rose. A four through midwicket won the game and took me to a satisfying 69 not out.

As ever, the game was played in an excellent spirit and both teams repaired to the pub to begin rehydrating in the traditional manner.

Bootham Park v Post Office June 18th 2006 at Bootham Park

Back Row: John Patrick, John Crowe, Phil Holland, Jamie Case, Wayne McMahon, Will Outhart. Front Row: Chris Storey, Matt Horner, Pete Mitchell, Richard Todd, Nathan Ellison.

Post Office (226-4) beat Bootham Park (215-9) by 11 runs

Winning the toss again, Pete Mitchell chose to bowl, gambling on the drizzle stopping and the sun coming out. It didn't. The rain was never heavy enough to stop the game, but it kept the outfield moist despite our stirling efforts to mop up water with the ball. Jamie Case and Richard Todd bowled well, despite the wet ball excluding any possibility of swing.

First change bowler Matty Horner turned in a great spell of seam bowling, picking up 3 wickets in his 8 overs, including that of the ever modest and charming Martin Baggaley. Phil Holland and John Crowe also bowled tightly but the real revelation was Wayne "Mac" McMahon. Bowling round the wicket, Mac moved the ball both in the air and off the seam, making it hard for even the Post Office's best batsmen to make solid contact with the ball. He finished with 1-36, having dismissed Glynn Botterill, caught-and-bowled for 32.

Post Office scored at an impressive rate, John Latham making his now traditional nearly-ton with a composed 93 not out. Martin Baggaley also chipped in a quick-fire 58 before trying one cocky shot too many and succumbing to Horner's Feng Shui. After 40 overs, Post Office had amassed a statuesque 226-4.

Bootham Park's reply began shakily as John Patrick was bowled for 1 by Paul "Scooby" Thornton, but Chris Storey and Pete Mitchell consolidated, putting on 93 for the second wicket before Botterill nipped both of them out in a devastating spell of 4-6 in 4 overs. Storey's batting was limited by a back spasm, yet he still made an excellent 63, picking the gaps and placing the ball with a maturity far beyond his years. Mitchell notched a useful 30.

John Crowe and Horner both batted well for 37 and 29 respectively but the overs were running out. Bootham's innings closed on 215-9, 11 runs short.